memories

Crookedly Woven Thoughts

Image result for wars within THE MIND AND HEART

Where must the mind land? Where must it traverse to?

It must speak for itself to rise and draw on the versatile goodness of fate…

It wishes to grapple in the light just as it does in the dark..

Must it bow, must it be, must it take flight? And in direction ??

Now it speaks a mingled concoction of crookedly woven thoughts..

 

 

Ain’t there enough food on the streets to feed this epidemic of scarcity?

Ain’t there enough love in your heart to heal all the hurt?

Ain’t there enough dust settling on the blood to awaken the heartless with its stench?

 

 

There are ghastly streets, rotten drunkards, thirsty for more,

There is enough monsterity to hope for a shower of hailing empathy..

A desperate need to be rescued from depths of such self destruction..

 

 

Was man born only to rinse swords in tears..

Do those who suffer only remember of the ways to inflict?

The wars of despondency, a continuum of repulsive deeds ,

As human strides round and beneath..away from its naive beginning..

Representing the darkness mounted beneath the sheath of our existence..

 

 

For words to leave the bindings and reveal the intentions of the mind..

The heart must pace with the subtly settling, unknowingly induced pain..

Settling pain is unsettling, unnerving, ain’t it?

 

 

In wars, how must the heart clamber out to help itself?

 

Is life a war?  In ways it strives to derive the worth of time..

An urgency to grope for what is and isn’t yours,

What exists, just tumbling and rising on pillars of man’s uncertain designs..

A struggle to win hearts.. A struggle pacify the reflections in others..

A desire to be owned , A desire to own..

The wry ways of this human embodiment..

Darn the pain.. Darn the seemingly sodden truth..

 

 

Must I say something nice? I shall..

Heart must clot its wounds…

The man, must keep on keepin on..

And the light shall reach you as it stretches across to save us all..

Maybe there is love, hidden at the corners of your eye..

Maybe there is love, trembling to be undone on the ridge of your lids..

Maybe there is love in the hearts of the diseased.. maybe it will be find the hope..

And we shall smile in unison.. as plainly as the child does.. without reason..

In supple ways, maybe light will find all of us.

Categories: amibiguity, emotions, expressions, HOPE, INNOCENCE, life, light, living, lost, love, memories, mindset, poetry on life, poetry on love, questions, silence, souls, strength, struggle, the mind, time | 2 Comments

Etching On.

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Etching Patterns of thoughts on the papyrus of our mundane lives..

Designs we croon into the ear of our twin incarnation..

Curved stretches curbing across the mounts..the will, the wish..

Binding with the harsh breath..mellow at times.. juggling at times..

Strolling across to plot a breathless life..

 

Stumble over potholes dug by our own soles, Hasn’t thee rolled over, traced back, and strutted along then?

Yet the path of etched drawls back and forth scuttering on..

Inking on.. smug.. or giggly.. dreadful or greedy.. smiling through the blots of ink..

In hope in faith.. for trusting to be bound by fate.. we etch on..

 

A kind samaritan spinning the fate.. whispering incantations to string fate to wish..

A mildly fulfilled soul springs along.. sketching butterflies..

And yet then. droplets of pain blotch the ink just along the curve..

 

Words lack depth one might say.. as the heart fails to siphon strings of syllables

Wishing to only tell stories of memorable cons, fortitudes.. innocence and love..

How often has thy samaritan hidden in the cave of doubt?

How often does thee ponder of ways to escape the designs?

Trapped in thy own breath, memories and desires..?

 

Or did the benign fisherman row thee  across?

I think he did.. didn’t he?

Anew bridge..anew sketch..

Anew binding of faith and fate..as thee etches on..

 

P.S- Random thoughts, random sketch as I try to drown myself in something mundane.

 

 

 

Categories: amibiguity, answers, art, blogging, courage, darkness, DREAMS, emotions, expressions, freedom, fun, HOPE, life, living, loss, love, love oneself, memories, poetry, poetry on life, poetry on love, soul, strength, struggle, the mind | Tags: , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Musings on time

Image result for time

A grey sheath of stagnant silence…

Soluble darkness..

Dissolution into the surreal flow of night..

Punctured..embellished by the notion of time..

 

Rioting mind muses on..

Only the tick-tock of a mundane clock..

Piercing, distracting.. the still flow..

Ripples of time.. penetrating the mum..

The curve of a ripple postulates a moment..

The tick enunciating the bend..a crisp of time..

 

As life strolls in the direction unknown..

And shreds life into the passage past..

Like the leaves of deciduous tree..

Speaks through the crumpling murmurs of it..with it..it the mind..

The mind.. voices pivoting into their own helix..

It wonders..saunters into realms unbound..

“How can time be still, flow and yet wither away?”

A dimensionless entity.. like the surreal night..

Only absorbed and imprinted on the mind..

 

 

Categories: amibiguity, answers, darkness, life, light, memories, poetry, questions, the mind, time | Leave a comment

Random… Pride..self.. love?the fever.

The burden we call love could easily be hate..

The need to be needed.. the want to be wanted..

The fetal position of the grieving soul..

The penchant for ownership of the soul..

Too weary to follow.. too old to know where it is to be.. where it is to summon itself, to its home?

 

The haughty madam beneath the simpleton..Prays to avenge her pride..

Ain’t she a felon herself?

The girl who pounced in her father’s arms..prays to be set free..

The laughter that kindled her eyes.. the soft lines of nifty smile..

Muffled and ironed beneath the pains of frightful wars fought in her heart…

 

In the end when bones brittle crumple.. and flesh melts..

The hearts surge with combative pain..

Left are two souls lost.. facing  walls grounded on either sides..

The mirror reflecting the ugliness of it all..

In thy own eyes.. the glass shows black..

Pride is harrowing in the pits its own dungeons..

 

Ohh.. the  depths of ditches we dive into..

The sins we commit in the name of love..

Sinful of hateful acts towards self.. and then towards the other..

What is love but a roped..tangled path..

Curious pull.. one strolls and then the moments dribble away..

One is siphoned..tipsy into another Moonlit forest.. another home…

Aren’t you lost yet?

 

Where do you turn when the bridges you built are trampled upon..

Fallen beneath the sea of distance…

When human made altercations.. distractions..  steal the good.. gnarl it from your grasp..

Turn away from home.. to find that you have none..

And only the dungeons and pits.. fraught with felons of your heart..

Where shall you find your freedom now?

Who shall row you back to the haven you once knew?

How shall thee save thyself from distraught nature of thy heart?

Where shall thee find thy home.. thy solace and salvation?

 

 

 

 

 

Categories: amibiguity, crazy, darkness, emotions, expressions, life, loss, lost, love, memories, poetry, poetry on love | 3 Comments

Simple Friendship

Its called friendship you know..

The light in my eyes.. at a simple smile in yours..

The spark when hopes shines through the tunnel..

The Rebellious laugh when the fortitude gives away..

Our bizarre plans blow against the wind..

And we rise victorious surfacing at the shortest stairwells clambered..

Its the smile and laugh my heart craves..

Its the pain my soul wills to diminish..

Thy tender heart.. understands my pain.. and mine yours..

Its simple touch of human likeness..

 

Its called friendship you know..

The pain inflicted on you..reflects in my eyes..

As does in yours..

The tremor in your voice.. finds a helpless flutter in my heart..

But when your words sting.. to where shall I turn..

For it is your presence that soothes my pain..

Yet.. I know.. you shall be there when I turn back..

For a sincerest person like you..is hard to find..

 

Forgive my anomalies dear..

Harbor no ill of me.. You find place in my pain..

But more so in .. more so in carefree laughter..

Pondering.. I find your heart pure..

And mine wishing only the place of a life long friend  in pain and gay remembrance..

And your life to ride to your dearest hopes and dreams.

For Its simple friendship.. you know.

 

Dedicated to a dear friend… its a few simple words.. I couldn’t find ways to disguise my ways.

 

 

Categories: courage, DREAMS, emotions, expressions, friends, HOPE, life, living, love, memories, poetry, poetry on life, strength, struggle, the mind, time, youngsters | Tags: , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Oh Shush Shush

A piercing splinter tears apart the soul’s periphery.

I ponder; did a cane pass through dragging, leave behind what it wouldn’t miss?

Or a rose placed artfully on the soul grow on its thorn, It was plucked leaving behind the prickly bit..

It’s such a blur; it won’t stall for a moment of retrospect or introspect,

Breath is the wind blowing the wretched splinter in circles, a horrendous stormy weather,

It leaves thy home in a pile of powdery remains, clustered fragments of curtained images…

It leaves thy inner child panting and wheezing, clutching in places,

Colored in red-brown dust, the color of eyes, the color of blood,

 A darting arrow from the eyes of the strangest stranger splits it open..

The color of the red syrup slurps through the tear, The wound is to be dug deeper before healed..

The heart is to die again..and again and again.. 

In penance for the acts of desperation; Death of the heart is necessary,

Pain is an addiction, It traps your breath, But you are left feeling alive, just alive is the real alive;

It is audaciously exchanged for the empty vastness, where one is not in the desert, but beneath it..

 

Oh shush shush, silence the sounds of the restless breaths,

 And the splinter shall stall for a moment of freedom and rest,

Raise thy torrid eye, look into the sky,

Watch the clouds afloat, row through still air, silent breeze;

 Watch the sky crack to reveal a bluer stillness,  

Oh shush shush..

Breeze flows on the tracks of life, life that thrives in arid, humid, torrential days and climaxes,

 Felt in the eyes, like a feathered touch on the skin, the unruffled flow of life in the strangest of times,

 Flutters of the tiny sparrow’s wings, sudden thrashing and then for a moment afloat in the lazy wind,

Reaching her nest after a day of grains, straws and droplets of water,

Rampaging from wall to wall, beneath rare shadows and scorching rays,

The quivering tips of darkest of green leaves swaying in surrender, slightest momentum released,

Oh shushed are you?

Does the pain now sail away with the breeze?

 Does the vacuum fill with sights of nature, the tiniest electrifying moments, the miraculous breadth of life?

The splinter slain to unconsciousness, Breathe in deep the peculiar scent of nature afresh,

Dear mind, Oh shush..ponder away from consciousness drugged in constant spiralling stale pain,

Stride into the invigoratingly alive life, Stroll away from thy own trepidations,

For the cures, the answers lie in the breeze, the clouds..

The flutter and the quiver, the tremor as nature breathes with thee in solace,

Carrying you to home indeed, Releasing you to breathless nomadic winds, just as you are..only standing there..shushed in your heart.

Categories: answers, emotions, expressions, freedom, HOPE, INNOCENCE, life, life, light, memories, mindset, poetry, poetry on life, poetry on love, strength | Tags: , , , , , | Leave a comment

Oh Dear Man..Tell me..

Oh Dear Man..tell me..

I shed tears engraved with your name

I find pieces of me seething in pain,

The pieces you touch heave and sigh in your remembrance,

And the parts in oblivion to your soul.. lay still waiting to be asked…

 ”Would you like a ride to the dawn with me?…Where is it that you belong and what say is your story?”

They shrink in the drought of the long summer haul, blind creatures with a pitiful stature, feeding on pain that trickles down their layers…

 

But you walk away, back turned, darkening my heart in your shade,

Marked by memories in the scorching shape of your form,

I stand waiting to run, run far away from your scorn,

But stranded I am.. limp ,  no caves to hide……………..As all are lined along hills of the grieving town..

The town where paths lead astray to the homes of dead hopes, drunken wishes, follies of wants..

 

You are but a mad man, a wolf.. Fighting like the brave life and death for his pride..

For deeper dreams and friends that that fill your soul..

And I am but the prey of the calls you sound in the moonlight..

I find myself twisting away to seek the fork that finds me at my sun kissed doorstep,

Where I might find you to be a thought of another distant self,

Where light of love might remain a haze without a tryst with its dark shades..

 

Let me stroll back, do not call me back in time,

Let me forget that I met you on the lone walk one very eerie night,

I was straddled by a sudden bliss..but now the bliss churned with a deadly essence..

The callous reckless wanderlust of unrequited passions…Brimming the chalice of tonight’s spirit..

 I find my mind sinks into yours with a penchant to read thee like a manuscript about all that is life…

Oh dear man, tell me… where shall I seek your heart..

Else show me the route to that moment before..years ago..then I shall escape to find mine in whole..

Categories: life, love, memories, past, poetry, poetry on love | Tags: , , , , | Leave a comment

Departing

Let those minute pulses that beat in your mind, even as the breath has been felt and lost,

Let those beats faint away into void; let the breaths die their natural death,

Tie not the noose with one hand and pump your heart with another,

Either your hold, slacken it and let the beats, the breaths heave in deep agony,

And find your mind gushing with blood and tears of yesterday’s war,

Or drop the other hand and string the noose to the bell,

Let it ring in the mind and dull the lights on the those darkened days, dusky nights, chain the gates

Its time, it’s time to depart from the world of those wishful sensations,

Memories and questions, and desires clutch your heart, yet let’s depart;

To cleanse the heart that drowns in the pool of purple poison,

Let the heart beat to slander those memories, and yet as much as I try, all is still,

Hands shake, fighting the wolf’s claws to drag you back to that desert, the bindings of being human,

Can you depart the deserted land; pass the mirage not quenching your thirst?

Heart believes, beauty is just beyond the blinding horizon,

Is beauty indeed found, is faith brought back by a touch of innocence or just a lash of scalding truth?

Can beauty and faith be found in horrendous truth?

Pain, betrayal, unrequited love, unparalleled atrocities, Or is the child’s tear the only sacred beauty?

Do the birds of war and love embrace to find peace?

Does the desert finally show its true treasures and horrors?

And peace remains as delusional as the belief in the moon’s promise of shimmer on the dark fortnight?

Do the eyes droop and breathing ease resting on the bosom of a mate?

Or do yours and mine-souls,

Do we finally depart with pain in our bones and mirages in our eyes and thirst on our cracked lips?

But departing is only a trapping, the truth only a fantasy,

We are prisoners in our infinitely deserted land,

And answers evade and delude sinking into the sand.

Categories: life, memories, poetry, poetry on love, the mind | Tags: , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Reflection in Thy eyes

Tell me do you love me.. tell me..

Tilt that sinful nape, that sweet chin,

Look into my eyes and speak the words that embrace your heart in  solitary despair,

That are clutched by claws, that are floating in the sea of  your blasphemous cravings,

 

I mumble..

I know not..I know not.. I know nothing of love..

But I drench in the words that sway from your eyes,

I folly to walk astray into the fog where your scent drugs my senses,

I forget the windows that shatter light upon us,

My thirst for you caressed by your unearthly beauty,

 

But moments are still only in the moment,

They was past before my lips could part,

And have withered now into lost causes,

I speak words to hide my shadows of rising sensations,

I speak tongues to tell tales wrapped in lines of desolate poetry,

All from my crest of lone recitations,

You ask not, I remain mum,

 

You know not the soul me,

Yet your touch lies here like dew drops on a leaf, You sink in,

The desire, a remembrance stinging like whip on flesh.

Its a string unstrung that tugs me, I fall into you,

 

Tell me your pain, tell me your desires,

Let me flip the pages,

Let me read the lines imprinted beneath your soul’s ledger,

Let me caress your soul as you rest on my bosom,

 

I know not…I know not.. I know nothing of love,

Moments foregone, are crisp memories,

And immerse the heart in the quest for a song,

A song that synch’s with its beat,

Hum’s in the soul’s tongue of its melancholy desires,

A song it finds, but with words that speak no answers,

That tell nothing of the questions that swim,

Swim in the reflection of my soul, only in thy eyes

 

Categories: amibiguity, darkness, emotions, expressions, life, life, love, memories, Music, poetry, poetry on life, silence, soul, the mind, time | Tags: , , | 10 Comments

Cocoon of Freedom

Do you become what you hate?

Do you become what you love?

Or do you only love what you can’t become?

Or do you love only your reflection in every grain of sand?

What we carve our souls into, is already a mould,

It has thorns, it has nails, and it leeches onto the images our eyes clasp onto,

Every crisp notion of existence I have was a haze before,

It lay stale, rotting in the fungus that was fed to my mind,

At a time when the world I fathomed to exist, existed in only patterns of right and wrong,

And I chose to clutch the trailing thoughts of others,

I stuttered to express what I did not understand,

 I raveled myself in which I bludgeoned myself to believe,  

 

 A ferry waited at the end of my dying stammering self,

One fateful night I met the night guard at the bank,

He asked me if I wanted to crossover then, morning the ferry would be gone,

I collected the shattered pieces of my mind; some jagged ends bled my soul,

On the way I tripped on the tightly laced shoes,

 Then left them near the old tree from where hung ragged clothes, masks and shoes,

Barefoot, I got onto the ferry and set off to the other side,

To find missing pieces of my mind,

To be in presence of those colors of light,

 As the beams passed by my soul, images under the veiled reality would form,

Focusing from infinity to a my finite existence, a surreal view,

Yet an existence where my soul could breathe and could trace the waves,

The curved turbulence that sounded the hymns and curses sung by own mind,

Mindlessness was a destructive interference of rays trapped in a cottage,

 Walls camouflaged by words scripted by others,

I burnt it down, but the fire still crackles, smoke still blows in the wind,

 

A rusted bridge, a path appears every fortnight,

 A path back to the village of my dying thoughts,

Though much gibberish, mutters my mind, and obscure images, see my eyes,

I shan’t climb that bridge,

Heart is a nomad, but it resides in this land now,

Though tormented by the unknown, it is enlightened,

 But the ground is slippery, is cracked and heated, feet are sore and blistered, and nights are chilly,

Yet the solitude is comforting,

 As my fixation with my baffling shell of infinite reality is my cocoon of freedom.

 

Categories: change, darkness, emotions, expressions, life, love, love oneself, memories, mindset, poetry, poetry on life, questions, re-incarnation, soul, the mind, time | Tags: , , | Leave a comment

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