silence

Crookedly Woven Thoughts

Image result for wars within THE MIND AND HEART

Where must the mind land? Where must it traverse to?

It must speak for itself to rise and draw on the versatile goodness of fate…

It wishes to grapple in the light just as it does in the dark..

Must it bow, must it be, must it take flight? And in direction ??

Now it speaks a mingled concoction of crookedly woven thoughts..

 

 

Ain’t there enough food on the streets to feed this epidemic of scarcity?

Ain’t there enough love in your heart to heal all the hurt?

Ain’t there enough dust settling on the blood to awaken the heartless with its stench?

 

 

There are ghastly streets, rotten drunkards, thirsty for more,

There is enough monsterity to hope for a shower of hailing empathy..

A desperate need to be rescued from depths of such self destruction..

 

 

Was man born only to rinse swords in tears..

Do those who suffer only remember of the ways to inflict?

The wars of despondency, a continuum of repulsive deeds ,

As human strides round and beneath..away from its naive beginning..

Representing the darkness mounted beneath the sheath of our existence..

 

 

For words to leave the bindings and reveal the intentions of the mind..

The heart must pace with the subtly settling, unknowingly induced pain..

Settling pain is unsettling, unnerving, ain’t it?

 

 

In wars, how must the heart clamber out to help itself?

 

Is life a war?  In ways it strives to derive the worth of time..

An urgency to grope for what is and isn’t yours,

What exists, just tumbling and rising on pillars of man’s uncertain designs..

A struggle to win hearts.. A struggle pacify the reflections in others..

A desire to be owned , A desire to own..

The wry ways of this human embodiment..

Darn the pain.. Darn the seemingly sodden truth..

 

 

Must I say something nice? I shall..

Heart must clot its wounds…

The man, must keep on keepin on..

And the light shall reach you as it stretches across to save us all..

Maybe there is love, hidden at the corners of your eye..

Maybe there is love, trembling to be undone on the ridge of your lids..

Maybe there is love in the hearts of the diseased.. maybe it will be find the hope..

And we shall smile in unison.. as plainly as the child does.. without reason..

In supple ways, maybe light will find all of us.

Categories: amibiguity, emotions, expressions, HOPE, INNOCENCE, life, light, living, lost, love, memories, mindset, poetry on life, poetry on love, questions, silence, souls, strength, struggle, the mind, time | 2 Comments

Wars we fight

Who dwells in their own head?

I do.. I do..

I live there with a man of dispiriting affections..

Broth of hatred.. froth of nonchalant love..

Rebelling against my rationale.. Again which is mine and which is his?

Life seems spent at war with love…

Moving on…

Which emotion is not to be felt?

I ain’t following a parchment of archaic laws…

Written and misspelled by all engrossed in a deep desperation of a kind..

Desire to be remembered… desire to be embraced.. Desire to be discovered..

Desire to be designed upon.. embarked into.. a journey from soul into a another..

Desire to appraised with condiments… tokens from one soul to another..

Who… which monk.. which teacher.. which bud..which man or women…

Can surpass the need to live.. need to be, to find which has not been found within..

And the need to feign control..

To him who I love.. who I have loved.. I can love..

I have found not the meaning of it..

I will always bless thee… find thee in my memories… search for thy love..

I hope.. this day.. the gulf of resentment has cleansed as much as it has left my heart..

Apologies I render.. and hope I shall find thee again.. in life.. in love.. in my heart..

.

And the man who fights with rationale.. in my head..shall always loose..

For rationale.. feigns control..

An incomplete drama of scribbled words.. this shall be..

For none can unfold the unrest of love and desires..

The conundrum of what to be.. who to be.. to succumb..

Or to succumb again.. just, to which…. ?

Categories: amibiguity, answers, DREAMS, emotions, expressions, life, love, poetry on life, poetry on love, silence, struggle, the mind | 5 Comments

The Reflection in Thy eyes

Tell me do you love me.. tell me..

Tilt that sinful nape, that sweet chin,

Look into my eyes and speak the words that embrace your heart in  solitary despair,

That are clutched by claws, that are floating in the sea of  your blasphemous cravings,

 

I mumble..

I know not..I know not.. I know nothing of love..

But I drench in the words that sway from your eyes,

I folly to walk astray into the fog where your scent drugs my senses,

I forget the windows that shatter light upon us,

My thirst for you caressed by your unearthly beauty,

 

But moments are still only in the moment,

They was past before my lips could part,

And have withered now into lost causes,

I speak words to hide my shadows of rising sensations,

I speak tongues to tell tales wrapped in lines of desolate poetry,

All from my crest of lone recitations,

You ask not, I remain mum,

 

You know not the soul me,

Yet your touch lies here like dew drops on a leaf, You sink in,

The desire, a remembrance stinging like whip on flesh.

Its a string unstrung that tugs me, I fall into you,

 

Tell me your pain, tell me your desires,

Let me flip the pages,

Let me read the lines imprinted beneath your soul’s ledger,

Let me caress your soul as you rest on my bosom,

 

I know not…I know not.. I know nothing of love,

Moments foregone, are crisp memories,

And immerse the heart in the quest for a song,

A song that synch’s with its beat,

Hum’s in the soul’s tongue of its melancholy desires,

A song it finds, but with words that speak no answers,

That tell nothing of the questions that swim,

Swim in the reflection of my soul, only in thy eyes

 

Categories: amibiguity, darkness, emotions, expressions, life, life, love, memories, Music, poetry, poetry on life, silence, soul, the mind, time | Tags: , , | 10 Comments

Designs by Time- A Maze

Time, It walks as though it hath not a care,

Aloof, dispassionately sauntering, sparing neither a thought for all the desolation, nor the euphoria

Existing all by itself, Thriving in its solitude,

Plotting to cast its well scripted plans onto the void, our world, our lives,

Manifesting illusions, one or multiple for its every click,

We mortals, just mere pawns while it attempts at injecting thrill into it’s veins,

“Oh you epitome of enigmatic existence, why not teach us to live like you?

Maybe it ain’t worth your creative talents, ”

 

A sharp edged hand of a clock, it’s partner in crime,

It plays its part quite beautifully, dexterously,

Digging into the soul’s flesh, Carving out a maze, a unique piece of art,

Maze keeps expanding infinitely in all directions and dimensions,

Invading and capturing the seemingly insurmountable highs and non echoing abyss,

You, my detached mate watch with me the intricately woven designs of your illusions,

Every passing moment absorb the musings of the soul winded in the maze,

Some elated hummings,  some whispers drowning in dread, some lost mutterings of a tipsy lass,

Every click of the clock and scratch of the edge masks the screams and flicks away the tears,

 

Stormy it is,A few marks fade, a few lines blur,

But the hand retraces the trial, else digs and drags crossing to make new paths,

A rendition of mine treads down the old known pathways,

Another struts along the anew one,

Peering ahead, trying to discern unexpected twists, turns and dead ends,

Or misleading ends blurred by fog, Its walls smudged and smeared with just paintings of landscapes beyond,

As though the landscapes are real pathways, not just delusional sights,

 

Inside the maze, one is bound to catch glimpses of oneself, maybe combat the other,

The pawn must face itself, loose itself to seek the truths that haunt and breeze through here,

Despite the unattainable pedestal of truth, the non-existent end one must trudge on if not gallop,

Indulge self in demolishing and resurrecting to find the same and demistify the secrets in here,

One must clutch on to the dagger like hand,

Engage thee, time, while savoring the derisive scars your designs impinge upon us,

While you mock us with your unaffected, disavowed  stature.

Categories: amibiguity, emotions, expressions, life, mindset, places, poetry, poetry on life, silence, society, soul, time | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

To my Dear Sweetheart

To my dear sweetheart,

You are sweet indeed, I am sure, but many a flavor twist and turn your primal taste,

I crave to know your compositions,you are music is uncanny,forever pushing, then swaying me as I stand at the edge,

Are you fickle, or is that just your pretentious sheath, trying to tumble me as I stamp my own feet?

But you are me, why would you do that ?oh my sweetheart, enlighten my being today,

I search your depths, I seek answers from you for the wise old owl you are,

Are you as wise as I make you out to be?  I vouch for you, you know that,

But hope, you haven’t joined hands with a third, ally you think it is?

No my sweet, destiny is elusive, a trap, an ally or foe, I know not,

Colluding with a power above both of us, you and me are one,

We create karma, thy power, my will and trust, but the third animal, hath no stakes in our karma,

Lets not invite or give space to that invader,

As I skim, then scan, then delve deeper harrowing the depths, braving my fears,

Yes,my fears,as I wade through the sand, it all comes together behind me,the sun shines no more,as I lie beneath the desert,

I ask you, what are you capable of? Are you capable of love? Do you understand love?

I ask you, how do you reign you devils, how do you recognize them, how do you accept them for what they are?

I ask you again, love,can you really love another? Or do you seek to only fill the pores, satiate your desires, then call it love,

Don’t you find solitude alluring? Its serene charm awakening voices of truth,

Sounds that were before lost in the cacophony of mindless babbling of a world decked in self made garments of lies,

Adorned by jewels that reflect the masks we put on, the paths we carved for other’s minds,artifacts of our orderly lives,

The white noise dissipates, a foghorn that slowly drives away and silence of solitude permeates,

Yet, you pursue to posses another, You see, having glimpsed your weak spots I try to leash you,

Remind you of the debacle, the toxic potion in the chalice,

That tempts one into loosing any sense of self, stagnating self nourishment,

As I search for the point of equilibrium, It strikes me,

You need, you desire to walk in solitude with another who walks in his own,

To look into the eye and share, yet not own or be owned,

To find solace in your own self yet stroll into the Gardens of your haven holding the hand of another,

Your penchant for purpose and reason commendable,

Yet at times one might find in purposeless journeys ones purpose,

Or if not, you might see sights that enlighten your mind with both anew questions and unwound answers,

My dear sweetheart, my dear soul, I leech onto you,

To shield you lest the treacherous demons of our world wrap you in their claws,

Yet I know, it is you who are my savior, my retreat, my trustworthy ally, my cauldron of strengthening elixir.

Categories: amibiguity, emotions, expressions, life, love, love oneself, mindset, Music, places, poetry, poetry on life, silence, society, soul, the mind | Tags: , , , , , | 2 Comments

Unfading Moments

A moment that carves each of its blinks on your soul and flesh,

Blushes the mind with the memory of just that one instant,

Oh, the allure of reliving that moment,

Feeding the soul with every passing emotion,

It was dark, drizzly, soft pitter-patter, As the two stood beneath the trees,

Glow of the street light illuminating their eyes,  

The night beckoned two souls to wish adieu,

As a hopeful shy heart stood by,

Wishing to know the heartbeat of the almost stranger by her side,

The parting arrived too soon, A slight look passed, fingers intertwined for a few instants, 

Unwilling to let go, yet shying away,

And oh the blood rushed through, nerves felt alive, Flesh desired a closeness,

Eyes cast low, fumbling thoughts took over, the hand of shy heart felt bereft of the touch, 

The heart stood watching the stranger’s retreating silhouette disappear around corner,   

A dull sadness fogged the sweet aroma of molten emotions,

A critical mind, turned a critical eye to the heart’s shy attire,

Wishing for paths to meet soon, to imprint the heart with the desired wishful memory,

How the soul craved for time to expand then,

Stretch longer than it already does in the mind’s eye now,

The soul, as it travels back and forth,

Savoring the emotions bound to her memory,

The unfading moments, the almost stranger, the enticing yet serene night.

Categories: emotions, expressions, life, life, places, poetry, silence, soul, the mind | Tags: , , , | 3 Comments

Scales Of Evolution

balance

Human was not born into this world,

Only evolved from the animals we call beasts today,

Before the evolution tipped the scales,

The seas, the mountains the earth, the petals, the weeds

The shells, the sand, the morsels of life that traversed with the wind,

The earth bubbled in its serene existence with zealous purity,

The purity that a mountain spring sprinkles upon the dwellers,

Flowing sometimes stealthily,

At times flowing with an exuberant force,

Young and vibrant in search of new lands to explore,

All the forms of life, large and dynamic, shrewd and slippery,

Roaring and domineering, small and fastidious,

Lived on these streams, on those springs

They pounded the land when in need,

Their formidable yet magnificent animalistic power shook the earth

But the scales were always left balanced,

Logic, a reason that led to rise of another species,

Nameless multifarious species rather,

This age, Evolution is taking a toll as one species looses itself in a whirlwind of its own creations,

This day, this period of earth’s and its dwellers lives,

The springs, the air, the pure forces of life infected by the viral uproar,

Are drying up, worse corrupting all that it touches,

And vanquishing the purity to graveyards dug by our evolved mindlessness,

Or rather mindfully shrewd actions,

Foolish we are to think our time immortal,

Trapped we are in the science we harrowed out from this earth,

Entangled we are in our own traditions and thoughts,

Thoughts that were led by reason once are today shackled by the lack of it,

As we abhor change, obnoxiously pride ourselves on our social systems,

As we evolve into what evolution had never fathomed possible.

It’s time to rename ourselves,

Unless we let the springs sprinkle us again,

Clean the dirt, the marsh,

We assimilate, we mellow down,

We withdraw and loosen our adamant sense of ownership,

We melt the shackles of power,

Mold the molten steely power into the axe that could bring to surface our former self

Or make it the magical ingredient,

An ingredient added in potions drunk by us to turn into the personification of godliness,

A godliness that is stirred with drops of devil’s blue blood to tip the scale towards a balance.

Let’s reach, let spiral back to the point of incidence of human and beast.

Categories: amibiguity, change, Economic Disparity, education system, emotions, expressions, feminism, Hypocricy, life, life, mindset, Moralizing, poetry, poetry on life, re-birth, re-incarnation, silence, society, soul, the mind | 2 Comments

Looking For something, Am I?

download

Looking for something, am I?

No, no, what can I be looking for,

I am here; all I need is here,

Ain’t that true?

What are we looking for?

Are we looking for anything at all?

Or are we, am I staring into a space,

Hoping to find something, anything at all,

I find so many things, but I still find don’t find anything at all,

They all, all that I find shrinks into the mud,

Or dissipates and gets sucked away into another time zone,

Oh I see this, do I? He seems to have found it,

What is it that he has found? How does he know?

He just knows, you say; then of course it’s inside him,

Oh can’t I also have it, no, no it’s uniquely built for him,

To have it, you have to steal him; you can’t do that now can you?

I can’t do that; of course not,

Or you have to; I have to be him,

Now why would I do that?

Am I supposed to be looking for something?

I am just seeing it, and I want it all,

Or nothing at all,

Yes I want nothing at all, all of it, it’s too much pain

But nothingness, I am empty,

 Gosh I am hungry for hunger

Give me back my food, my pain, my apricot of emotions

Give me back what I never had,

How can I miss something I never had?

Yes, bizarre that is, why do tears flow outwards?

I never had it,

If I had it, was it from within me?

If so, then dear nobody can take it,

And if it went amiss, tears would flow inwards,

You and I would quench our thirst with it, wouldn’t we?

Am I confusing you lasses?

You see I am in a puddle, questions questioning themselves,

Am I here to look for something? Or do I just see it,

See, and not want it,

Am I to fill myself, am I not already full?

Or am I to empty myself and fill and empty and refill?

Do you see what I am looking for? Do you see at all?

Hope your eyes are not inwards,

Or is that the best way to see? The rest is just viral corruption?

Looking for something, am I?

Categories: amibiguity, emotions, expressions, life, poetry, poetry on life, silence, soul, the mind | 2 Comments

The Cave of Delirium

The urge to fight evaporates,

Turns to smoke trapped in closed cave

A cave whose walls are impenetrable by another,

Another than the spirit where resides the cave,

Or does the cave host the spirit?

Spirit only an inhabitant, seeking shelter,

Only to end up hostage..

What one makes, one procreates,

It takes over the maker,

Imbibes and savors the power to bind the maker,

Slave it or set it free,

Unless the maker stays the keeper of the cave,

 Standing at edge between the two worlds,

One outside and the other within, a perfect osmosis

It’s a cave of delirium,

The spirit’s exploits and endeavors,

Deeds and misdeeds, take a toll,

Reason and logic, intuition and emotion burn,

diffuse to take a form of their own,

One starts evolving, twisting and turning to define the other,

Playing a game to delude the spirit,

keeping it trapped in the deadly spiral of its own illusions,

Smoke only gets denser,

 As the keeper now shackled in the mid air is choking,

Choking on vapors,

Vapors rising from the fire of its own creation of ruins,

 In its own cacophony, crackling noise,

That deafens it, shoving aside any shadow of sanity,

As the spirit that lit the fire, stares at it delving deep,

Searching for a way out to the other side, outside a hopeful reality,

A moment of epiphany,

The only way out is it to burn in the pier till there isn’t a pier to burn,

The cave of delirium, it holds no ground, burns with the keeper, the spirit

A spirit is immortal; it takes birth from the ashes to reincarnate into another rendition.

Categories: amibiguity, crazy, darkness, emotions, expressions, life, life, mindset, poetry, poetry on life, re-birth, re-incarnation, silence, society, soul, the mind | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Two wells

Two wells,

One at the north,

The other south,

All that the mind conceives,

Falls or is tossed into one well,

Or the other,

None escape the adamant blackened gravity,

One a well of soulful goodness,

The other a black hole of soulless evil,

The question is to rise above or sink below?

Sink below the goodness,

And drip in delusional godliness?

To rise above the perceived evil,

Or to sink below and beat it at its game?

If hovering over or thrashing around in thy chosen well,

The soul might sink into the well beneath the well too, you see,

And then one becomes the other,

 Havoc inhabits conscience, Thunderous collisions within,

Soul is black or white?

It’s neither, rather just shades of grey,

Among the radiant colors that our eyes want to see,

Shades of grey in layers and patches,

In the end, no, as we spin and re spin

The water in both the wells remains murky if not marshier.

Categories: amibiguity, darkness, emotions, expressions, life, life, mindset, Moralizing, poetry, poetry on life, silence, society, soul, the mind | Tags: , , , , , | 7 Comments

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